December 17, 2010

Letter 'C'

After Halloween, I had a flu. It took me a week to be relieved from body pain, fever (2 days only) then came the sore throat which turned to coughing and lasted for another week. Then I had my allergy back & it was so frequent (demographics), then a swollen node in my neck. I made myself so alarmed with the symptoms of swollen node and itching & reading that dyeing hair was found as causes of NHL (Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma). It caused me too much stress, until we have an appointment with our Primary Care Doctor, he checked my neck for the swollen node & told me that it's still part of the viral infection (flu) that I had. He ordered for a blood test, 3 sets were taken from me. Then a phone call that I need to go back to have another blood test 'coz I have high sed rate (usually caused by inflamation). This again made me so worried, until I got the result which is negative. Thank GOD! But, I am so paranoid in whatever I feel or see in myself which tends me to think of What If I have the Letter 'C'? I can still feel the lymph node but currently I have colds so I should not be bothered. But, deep inside me, I am so freaking worried. I was advised that if my lymph node is still swollen, I better go to another doctor for second opinion. If my itchiness could be attributed to having NHL or whatever illness that caused swollen lymph node. Anyways, like what I believe in, it's only GOD who knows and can cure you. Sometimes he's giving you things to worry so that you'll remember to trust him. Those who underwent treatments are praying for recovery, in my case though I don't know if I have something or not, I keep on praying that GOD could heal me or my mind. May GOD bless me for more strength & courage! I have my mom in medication for hypertension, diabetes, allergy, vertigo & minor side effects, I don't want to go through that. Inasmuch as I wanted to know, the problem is there's nothing to know more, I have been to 4 kinds of blood test, I had antibiotics & the doctor told me that I'm fine. I hope I will be settled with that. I must admit I am scared to leave.

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