I had lunch with a friend last week and we did lots of catching up with things going on in our lives. I've met her during my first job here in USA. Anyways, she had marital problem and the culprit was 'alcohol'. She disclosed that she lived with an alcoholic and getting a divorce. She said that she can't forever live what she used to during the marriage. She did the best thing for her son because she's worried that her son might copy the same vice / addiction because he's been exposed on it. Kids learn by watching their parents behavior and she doesn't want that her son will totally lost his respect to his father because alcohol changes him and caused him to be disoriented most of the times. It caused lots of arguments between them especially when the guy used this as alibi as tool to unload stress. She mentioned that her husband's father used to drink a lot too and maybe this caused her husband to have copied that because he has difficulty in coping up with life's stress until it became a habit to addiction. I feel sorry for my friend's fate and asked her if they went to counseling first before they resorted to divorce and she said, they've done that but her husband's commitment was not 100% as hers, thus, it failed.
I was lucky to grow up with a father who gave up all his vices when he married my mom, so I've never seen my dad smoke nor drink, thus, no disagreements between my parents with regards to these vices. Alcohol is not a medicine to cope up with life and it always has a huge effect on one's mood that affects everyone else's. It changes one's behavior to worse and cause damage, emotionally or physically to others. Then when it spiraled up, others, can no longer hang on, and give up. Some still hangs on and hoping that things would change in God's time. I hope that my friend's husband could finally put alcohol behind him and move on to a life that God wants him to live. I hope he will realize that his family should come first and alcohol could not suffice his needs especially in the love and care aspect.