August 31, 2012
In my days with my part-time job, I realized great things such as I'm better than what I thought of. This not refer to my capabalities/know how of the job, it's about my status in life. Sometimes, I tend to feel sad and guilty for not doing/accomplishing something for my family especially for my son. I always put pressure on myself for that expectation of should-have. I kept on assessing my effort and I feel it's always short. Maybe I'm too hard on myself caused by my being idealistic. Having met and interacted lots of people with their own tale of sad stories due to their status in life, I told myself that I'm better than what I thought of. I started to count my blessings and see through these people's lives that I'm fortunate that I have my job, family to go home to, stable income, house to live in, family nearby, true friends and we're not in any form of medication. Sometimes, on the process of striving to succeed, you set some role models or people you look up to that motivate/inspire you to work hard but sometimes give you disappointment/frustration especially when you fail. Then, you look at yourself, your failure, your life compared with the one you look up to, you feel sadness. That's because you're focusing on the result but if you try to look at the hardship along the way that you were able to hurdle, you will be proud of yourself and like me will realize that you're better than what you thought.